But, I Don’t Want To!!!
Hey Friends,
“But, I don’t want to!” Is this a phrase you hear all the time? I sure do. We are used to hearing it from the nursery or even our children, but not from adults. The Scripture says to “grow up in all aspects unto Him which is the Head, even Christ.” (Ephesians 4:15) As adults we learn not to say things like, “I don’t want to.” We just don’t do it and hope no one will notice.
This principle plays out in so many areas of life: family, work, exercise, ministry, and even spiritual growth. We all know we do what we want to and try to forget the things we don’t like. That is why at FPC we try to hire people based on their passions – because we know that most will do what they want to do. So, what do we do about our “peas?” If you don’t like peas you push them around your plate but you never get around to eating them. We must learn to eat our peas if we want to grow as a leader and as a Christ-follower.
At the end of the day we must get disciplined. That means doing what you may not want to do, so you can get what you do want. Whether it is physical growth, vocational growth, or spiritual growth, effort is required. You must become a self-feeder, which is a huge mark of maturity. It seems that only a small percentage of people are able to do things they don’t want in order to achieve the end goal. For you and me if the end goal is to be more like Jesus, much it required. What is the next step for you to continue in spiritual growth and skip stagnation, which is where so many end up?
I hope and pray you have a plan.
Yours to count on,
Pastor
13 Comments
I like to get up early before all who are in my house gets up,to study and read. Because that seems to be the sweetest Quite time. I was surprised to see that Pastor puts His blog so early kuddos to you Pastor, I am Impressed that you give over to these sheep so early. Thank you. Yesterday I asked the ? maybe this could be my small group.This morning a book I am reading had this to say: James 1:8 and James 4:8. “By purifying your heart, you can truly be set free from being double minded. You must search your heart to see what is really important…People on there death bed are more likely to wish they had spent more time with family and friends.” A couple Saturdays ago Pastor was giving the reasons people give him or the other leaders for not going to small group or volunteering. This is where I laughed at myself this morning. I don’t want to do small group because it requires a streching for a while. So all this came together to make me realize that although I say I have a passion to share what God gives me with others I need to be around others to do it, the blog is good for me to but God wants more.So I need to go back to my closet [Mathew 6:6]. I need to not be double-minded and need a more clear heart. Thank-you God,Pastor and author for the wake-up.
Sabrina,
If you want an FPC small group and you’re willing to travel to Oak Ridge, I know four of them that I’d recommend personally. I know the leaders of these four groups well and trust them wholeheartedly. Three of the ones I can vouch for have children, but then there’s one group that’s mainly empty nesters. I’m sure lots of people on this blog have small groups in the “greater FPC” area that they’d vouch for (assuming your family is local to FPC). If you want info, feel free to ask (e-mail: a6k@ornl.gov).
Andy Kercher
This is so good and so true! It’s making yourself do those 100 crunches and getting up a little earlier to spend time in the Word, it’s being intentional in your day with people and with personal growth! Once again, thanks for the encouragement!
I don’t want to be a small group leader. A host home, I’m broke what will I feed them?
These have been my statements since day one. Now is no different from then except I was obedient. Starting rare speciality groups are hard and you have to fight every step. Everyone thinks their great ideas, BUT no one seems to want to help, participate, or put their name on the advertisement. I am only a leader for Jesus. I want to just sit back and help the other leaders and stand unnoticed. I would rather build the stage than be on it.
I DON’T WANT TO seems to be my answer to God, BUT I quickly answer “if it be your will – I will.”
@ Sabrina, great thought I hopt more heed it.
@ Andy, so true.
@ Emily keep up the good work.
Thank you Pastor Chris. I so need to be in the word more. I read daily devotions and your blog but I need to read the Bible more, I’m just being lazy about it. Time is what you make it and I am going to make the time to read. But I’m still not going to eat peas…ewww.
I can honestly say that I’m not an “I don’t want to” kind of person, to a fault. I think I’m on the total opposite end of the spectrum. I want to do it all. I want to be part of everything. I want to be there, doing God’s work and feel His presence. But when you get that involved, are you really looking and living for God? The funny thing about being that busy is that your quiet time tends to fade, or in my case become non-existent. You get so caught up in the rush-rush that stress enters your life. Those who know me know that I don’t do stress. Not that I can’t handle it, I just don’t do it. There’s no reason to be stressed in life if you have turned everything over to God. Here of late I’ve been stressed. *Warning flag* Who have I been listening to all this time. Most people don’t realize that the devil can tell you to serve God as well. But like everything else he twists it so that you’re so overburdened that your focus leaves God and is diverted onto something else. I have two journals, one is on my night stand at home and the other is on my desk at work. Neither has any words printed in them. Starting today I will crack one open and begin my quiet time at lunch. I pray that this will help me to slow down and truly hear what God has planned for me. ‘I don’t want to’ miss another quiet time. Thanks Pastor.
Andy, I live in Oliver Springs and would like to find a small group in the Oak Ridge/Oliver Springs area. Any recommendations for a young couple with two rowdy boys. My children have been what I let get me out of small group. They are not much for sitting and being quiet.
Melissa,
I don’t want to give out too much information out over a blog… particularly about other people’s groups. I can chat with you more over e-mail (rokparent@comcast.net) and get you in touch with the small group leaders. Two of the groups that I’d recommend personally have 20-something families with children allowed and the children are watched over by teenagers in both cases (one group recently changed times to Wednesday, so I don’t know for sure if they still have teenagers watching over the kids). The small group that my family is in has kids of pretty much the full range of ages… and a teenage boy and a teenage girl are in charge of childcare, but most of us are in our 30′s or early 40′s (not that age matters to us… or any of the other groups for that matter).
None of these small groups are based on the “sit and be quiet” model for children… the children are not expected to hang with the adults… the kids can hang with the parents until they feel comfortable, but only if they want to. The kids play together in all of these groups. What the kids do varies group to group… Nerf dart wars, TV, video games… different stuff.
Feel free to pop out an e-mail…
Andy Kercher
One thing I have noticed whenever I have the “I don’t want to” mentality about something — no matter what it may be — is that when I follow through, I typically am blessed beyond belief. I may say I don’t want to go the extra mile on a project, or I don’t want to show up to that event. But if I make myself, the result always seems (to me) to be more memorable because of the transformation that happened in my mind. Others agree / disagree?
I agree with #9 Josh’s point. It seems that in those moments of tension or unwillingness that the devil really puts his hold on us and tries to get us to makes excuses, sleep in, or don’t volunteer in the way that we would like. He gets us to fall on that “comfort zone” that we all love. In reference to Josh’s point, it is so true that when we go through with the volunteer experience, the camp, or just a church service, we do feel blessed and somewhat filled. As an attender of a different church, I enjoy this blog and comments.
Pastor Chris,
My family has in the past few month been going to church over your live stram on the internet in our own home . I felt the need to get all of the bellow out late last night after my bible study on to my Facebook and Myspace . I thought I would share it with you also but am not sure how to get it just to you so I am going to post it on here . Thank you for the push you gave that I so dearly needed !!
9/22/09
I have always loved God. He has always been in my life. Sadly he was a surface skin-deep part ( on my end only of course ) . He has always been there for me . He has carried me through a childhood trauma , having parents who divorced and a Dad who I only got to see twice a year , teenage heart ache, becoming a mother at the age of 18, single momness , a marriage ( that while a blessing ) has hit a bump or two in the road, financial hardship, fevers of 104 degrees for my youngest in the middle of the night , surgery , well lets just say God has had to flat out hold me up through a lot of my life. He has also always blessed me very much too. First with his never ending love for me , my beautiful children , a husband who loves me and accepts me for me and took me with all of my baggage. A family that is so wonderful to me , he has meet ALL of my needs and so very much more . Now is the part where I tell you he did all of this and well, ……. I did so very little for him. I was on a spiritual cruise control . I prayed 10 times a month and always with something that just was not working in my life . I read the bible 5 times a year and loved my family and thought this was good enough . I take a deep breath of shame right now . How did I ever think my unbalanced see-saw relationship with my lord was o.k. ! How could I take advantage of what a wonderful, loving and merciful God ? I am happy to tell you I see it I acknowledge now how wrong that was . I will never be able to give back to Jesus as much as he has given to you and me in his sacrifice . I have learned that Christ comes first in my life . Why? Because that is where I want him . My day is a constant prayer to him. My devotion to him has me waking up with no alarm clock 30 min. early to write in my prayer journal . It has me reading my bible and working on a bible study every night . I am now so very proud to shine my light for him. He has made my growth in him such a joyful experience . I feel my life being transformed and renewed and it is good . The swing for me ? What brought me to this place ? This place where I want to be who God needs and wants me to be . Well I am sure he has let many things lead me to this point but the moment the light bulb went on and the alarm went off ? He lead me to the Faith promise web site. He had me watch and soak in the archived messages titled ” The Unit ” . I can not tell you the tears that rolled down my face while I watched all four of these. They all cut who I was as a child of God and a mother to two of his boys in half. I was not being who God intended me to be. The one that tore into my heart ( in a good way ) was the one where a child was put into his chains , the chains that we as parents put on our children with all of the wrong choices and bad lifestyles we pick. I was putting these chains on my children . I was not giving them a good start to life . I was not teaching them to be the men God needs them to be. I was not modeling the behaviors and life that I want for them. I challenge you all as parents or future parents to click on this website http://faithpromise.org/ and listen to these messages . Let God move you through the love you have for your children. Thank you Lord for letting them move me , for opening my eyes and my heart to the love you have for me and my children. Thank you Pastor Chris Stephens and all who work at Faith Promise for being my stepping stone and kick start to accepting God’s overwhelming love and purpose for me as his child and as a mother of two of his boys !
Really appreciate you sharing this article.Thanks Again. Fantastic.